The diagnosis of stroke can be an extremely stressful and difficult time for families. Helping to support families at this time with sensitive and effective conversations can be difficult for staff. In this section we explore in more depth how to help support families. We show film clips of how to have an effective conversation and consider examples of ‘poor’ comments which may be unhelpful. These unhelpful comments are often made when staff feel under pressure. We give examples of better comments.
Click on each of these comments:
A wide variety of work-related factors can contribute to feeling under pressure. Select the icons below to reveal some common issues that can affect stress levels and your way of communicating.
‘I don’t have a crystal ball’
Alternative: ‘It’s hard to say how things will go over the next few days, but we will observe him closely and we should have a clearer idea in a couple of hours/days.’
‘I wasn’t here yesterday …’
Alternative: ‘Let me check in the notes and with a nurse who was on duty yesterday.’
‘I’m just the on-call doctor’
Alternative: ‘I’m the doctor responsible for your mother tonight; the consultant is Dr Jones. I’ll find out what I can from the medical notes-and if you need to know more, I can give you the name of someone to call tomorrow who can give you more information.’
‘You can’t use the kitchen’
Alternative: ‘I’ll get someone to make you some tea.’
‘The consultant isn’t available’
Alternative: ‘I will ask the nurse in charge … can you give me a couple of minutes to find him?’
‘The ward is short-staffed’
Families may want to assist with mouth care and comfort feeding. Observation and direct instruction are best to support families become more involved in care. Ensure everyone is updated regularly and aware of any changes.
What factors might make you abrupt with families?
- The family frequently want updates even when you are busy doing other things.
- You left the ward late at the end your shift last night and are hoping to get home on time today.
- The ward is understaffed.
- There have been several deaths on the ward already this week.
- The ward is very busy.
- The family were a bit abrupt with you yesterday.
- Several different family members independently phone wanting the same information.
- You have just started on the ward and have 22 patients to get to know.
- You are a junior doctor just covering the ward that evening.
- Bank staff unfamiliar with the patients and the ward.
- Your colleague who had been the main contact with the family is not on duty today.
Reflection point
Can you think of times when you have been abrupt or evasive with a distressed relative? Why do you think that happened? Are you avoiding a situation you feel unable to relate to? Are you stressed or tired? Have you had a recent bereavement? Was it an ‘off the cuff’ remark?
Page last reviewed: 16 Jan 2023
